(Minghui.org) Fellow practitioners may or may not have noticed some peer pressure on men and women who have come to the age of getting married. During the Chinese New Year celebration season, it has become a much discussed topic among family members.
Of course, it is only natural for elders to care, and inquire about the love and marriage life of the younger ones. However, some parents would reprimand and pressure their children regarding this issue. Other members of the family would also chime in and give their opinion. As a result this puts pressure on the child as well as on the parents.
As cultivators, I’ve encountered pressure and tribulation regarding this issue. My child was once a young practitioner, but now he is a single middle-aged practitioner. Many friends and family members misunderstand the issue. They belief that my son was still single because of his faith. Oftentimes they would also reprimand me, blaming me for not instilling in him the modern idea of falling in love and getting married.
The modern notion of marriage is: If both parties meet and they have a good impression of each other, they will then move in together, regardless if they would get married, or be divorced. Anyway, everybody else is doing the same thing, why pursue the idea of “until death do us part?” But, the thought keeps running through their mind that nothing could be worse than not having your own child.
I have also seen the so-called marriage therapists or consultants talking bluntly about their idea of marriage. They would suggest that if one has not been in a relationship, one should have sexual interaction because of desire. Or, if one has not been in a relationship, one would not succeed in marriage.
I disagree with the ordinary thoughts and notions on marriage. These are the exact attachments that we as cultivator need to eliminate. However, whenever I would see grandchildren bonding with their grandparents, I could not help but yearn and imagine what life would be like if I had a grandchild.
At times, I would ask my son if he is willing to enter into a relationship. My son would say that he is actually open to relationships and marriage, but he has not met the right person. His other half needs to be morally righteous, and a person like that is difficult to find nowadays.
I have heard about cases of practitioners “under pressure” forced their child to marry an ordinary person. After marriage, the practitioner’s child no longer studied the Fa and gave up cultivation. There have also been cases where practitioners get married. Then, they focus more on marriage than cultivation, turning into ordinary people.
It is not to say practitioners cannot marry, as cultivators, we must live by the rules of ordinary society. Master has stated this several times. I think that as long as we are not moved by what people say, it does not matter if a practitioner marries an everyday person.
There is a saying that says people need to have children for the succession of the generation. But, as practitioners, each child has his or her own place and destiny. He or she may reincarnate here, and he or she may also reincarnate someplace else. The cycle of life, and predestined relationships are all arranged by higher beings.
Ordinary people emphasize the idea of “having an offspring,” to benefit oneself when one grows old. As one grows older, parents would have to rely on their children. This is how human society has slowly become – mindless, and living for what they think is right for them.
As cultivators, Master has arranged our paths, everything is predestined. Cultivators do not have the problem of being immobile when growing older. As long as we believe in Master and believe in the Fa, do the three things well, we should not feel lonely. One will face tribulations on one’s cultivation path. In ordinary society, we can either use the positive or righteous way to change our environment or we may be polluted by the environment.
This is the first and only Fa-rectification in the universe where living beings may be saved. We are lucky enough to obtain the Fa and we have seen past the secular world. There only is one path for us: “Consummate in the Fa, honor our prehistoric vows, help Master in rectifying the Fa and save sentient beings.”
Master said:
“Opportunity knocks but once. Once the illusion that you cannot let go of disappears, you will realize what you have lost.” (“Practicing Cultivation After Retirement”, Essentials For Further Advancement)
Life is predestined, everyone has their own aspirations and own will, but one still needs to follow the predestined requirements.