(Minghui.org) I have suffered from cerebral palsy since I was young and used to severely limit my speech, non-verbal communication, and bodily movements. Hospital visits were a must each time I caught a cold. My irregular posture and unsteady motor coordination meant I often fell when I walked, and whenever I spoke, people had trouble understanding me. By the time I was 21, muscle atrophy and bone development issues had left my body in bad shape.
In 2010, I started practicing Falun Dafa. Throughout these 14 years of cultivation practice, my health gradually recovered to the point where I am now able to walk steadily and communicate effortlessly. Hospital visits have also become a thing of the past.
The reason behind my recovery remains inexplicable to modern science. Having witnessed this miracle, my family changed their opinion and started supporting Dafa. Here, I would like to share a few major tribulations I went through during my cultivation.
1. Accepting My Real Self
From the time I was young, I was smart, stubborn, temperamental, and competitive, unable to accept the fact that I was disabled. These character ideals were instilled in me by my family and the education system influenced by the Chinese Communist Party’s (CCP) values. My low self-esteem further cemented my rejection of anyone perceived as weak, while strengthening my desire to be strong and assert dominance over others in everything I did.
Two weeks ago, a disabled colleague where I work sought me out to talk about the ongoing conflict he was facing with his family. His family expected a lot from him, believing he could accomplish anything a normal person could, or even more. I asked, “Are you unable to meet their expectations?” He confirmed this was the case. I advised him to put himself in his family members’ shoes and try to see things from their point of view. I also advised him to remember how well his family had treated him. Afterward, on reflection, I realized I shared a similar problem. My family had high expectations, yet their impossible wishes were far beyond my current capabilities. I had been trying to realize their dreams without acknowledging how impossible they were. This attachment to human desire should be removed!
Rejecting the reality that I was disabled had nurtured my competitive spirit, inferiority complex, show-off mentality, jealousy, insatiability, and selfishness. As a Dafa practitioner who cultivates Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance, I had to wake up to the truth and eliminate my obsession with seeking human material gains. I am grateful to Master for giving me this opportunity to realize my limitations and accept my true self.
2. Involuntarily Rotating Neck
After celebrating the Chinese New Year, I returned to work and began experiencing significant changes in my body. My neck involuntarily rotated from my left to my right. This was accompanied by a feeling of discomfort in the right side of my body. After a while, my neck rotated from the right to the left, triggering feelings of discomfort in the left half of my body. Finally, my neck rotated back to the middle. Throughout this 90-day ordeal, my neck rotated nearly 400 degrees, shocking both my family and colleagues. Nobody had witnessed anything like this before.
Despite bouts of severe discomfort, I knew this process was eliminating my disease karma, and I recited poems from Hong Yin to boost my courage and endurance. Soon after I recovered and returned to work, I discovered a colleague in my workgroup had been promoted to group leader, while my name had been passed over. This colleague was not nearly as skillful as I was, so I felt resentful. But after reading Zhuan Falun for a few days and searching inward, I discovered my attachments to jealousy and showing off and seeking fame and fortune. After accepting the situation and rectifying my thoughts according to the requirements of Dafa, my anger vanished, and I felt lighter.
Soon after, a colleague told me that our new group leader wanted to transfer me to another group. My heart initially skipped a beat when I heard that, though I quickly realized that this had to be a test. I regained my composure, strengthened my righteous thoughts, and retained only one thought, “It is Master who has the final say. I will follow Master’s arrangements and accept wherever I’m assigned to.” I kept quiet and pretended I knew nothing about this proposal. As Master had described in his teachings, the transfer never went through, and the episode was just a test of my character.
3. Decisively Kicking My Smartphone Addiction
After reading the Fa Teaching at the 2019 New York Fa Conference, I attempted to kick my smartphone addiction but failed repeatedly.
During my time in college, I used a VPN on my mobile phone to circumvent China’s internet firewall and store data in my mobile phone. Because I had speech issues, which made it hard for others to understand me, my smartphone became a convenient means of communication. As my dependence grew, it became an indispensable part of my life. Although I attempted to give it up many times, these attempts were done without solid conviction, and after a while I would pick up my smartphone and play with it again.
Two recent incidents prompted me to work on giving up my addiction. The first occurred in November last year. My company gave all employees an extended holiday due to the COVID epidemic. I spent that time playing with my smartphone and watching short videos, until I found myself with COVID symptoms. This gave me the impetus to start studying the Fa, practicing the exercises, searching inwards, and discussing my tribulation with fellow practitioners. I kept up with this regimen even after my symptoms vanished.
Twenty-five days after my COVID symptoms had vanished, I was listening to the Minghui Broadcasting Cultivation Sharing selection number 1418, in order to increase my righteous thoughts regarding the false illusion of being infected with COVID, when I had an epiphany. The tribulations mentioned in Master’s lectures had indeed happened to me, signaling it was time to increase my gong and improve my character.
The second incident occurred toward the end of March and lasted until the start of April. My mind was in a state of confusion while my body felt uncomfortable. Unable to wake up for morning exercises or to listen to the lectures, I gradually stopped doing the exercises and spent more time playing on my smartphone. As a result, my condition worsened until I was near the limits of my endurance.
At this point, I happened to hear an article on the Minghui Broadcasting Forum for Young Disciples of Minghui, “Removing My Mobile Phone Addiction and Resuming a Righteous Path.” The practitioner shared how he gave up his smartphone addiction and encouraged fellow practitioners and ordinary people to do the same. After listening to it several times, I knew this was a sign from Master that I should give up my phone and resume cultivating. I decisively put down my smartphone, stopped relying on it for entertainment, and resumed my regular routine of studying the Fa and practicing the exercises. This calm acceptance was better than my previous forceful attempts to terminate my addiction. I learned that if one method does not work, I can always try to find another way.
4. Letting Go of My Attachment to My Parents
Before I went to elementary school, I lived away from my parents for a few months. I rarely saw them after entering middle school, but I have lived with ever since I entered college. From the time I was a child, other family members would badmouth my parents, telling me how badly I had been treated, how they disliked me, or things my parents did that went against their wishes. I have no wish to judge these people here and some have already passed away. Five years ago, as I was watching the TV program “The Ultimate Purpose of Communism,” I realized these adults had unknowingly done this to plant the seeds of hatred in a child’s heart. Innocent children would not realize this negative emotion until it was too late.
To ensure I could survive on my own, my parents made me do things independently. Yet my feelings of resentment and incomprehension would overwhelm me when I was faced with these challenges. I had hoped my parents would come to my aid when I faced discrimination and rejection, but I found myself dealing with this hurt alone. This heartbreak further deepened my hatred and resentment of my parents. Since practicing Falun Dafa, I have gradually let go of my hatred and resentment and begun to understand the difficulties and sorrow my parents hid from me.
Some time ago, my mother, a Buddhist who believes in the goodness of Dafa and often recites the phrases “Falun Dafa is good, Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good,” stabbed her finger. It began to swell, and I tried to persuade her to see a doctor. When she refused, I persuaded her to recite “Falun Dafa is good, Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good” and seek help from Master. She recited the phrases for an hour, and pus began to leak from her finger the next morning. By the afternoon, the swelling had subsided, and her infected nail fell off a week later. Her recovery prompted my mother to thank Master!
One day my father, who has also acknowledged the goodness of Dafa, came home for dinner and got angry at my mother for no reason. Seeing my mother’s pain, I advised her that cultivators will encounter such tests, and she should seize the opportunity to improve her character. I also recited Master’s teachings and poems to her. Three days later, I saw my mother had a red eye with a stye in it and advised her to recite “Falun Dafa is good, Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good” more often. Worry over her condition caused me to lose sleep that night. I looked inward and found my attachments to the human emotion of resentment and worry. As a Dafa cultivator, I cannot change the fate of others. I can only encourage my parents to do good deeds and convince them of the goodness of Dafa.
Now, my temper is better, and I have learned to be tolerant of others but strict with myself. I work steadily and consider things from the perspective of others when problems come up. The tremendous personality changes I underwent after practicing Falun Dafa changed my parents’ originally bad impression of Falun Dafa. They have even found themselves overcoming dangerous situations safely in recent years, thanks to Master’s protection. Thank you, Master!
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