(Minghui.org) Greetings, Master and fellow practitioners.
I’d like to talk about my cultivation experiences while working for The Epoch Times in Germany.
I got my first computer in 2004, and for some inexplicable reason, I developed an interest in design that grew stronger over time. I didn’t grow up with technology—it wasn’t until I was 19 that we had a phone installed in our home. I was more of a bookworm and a model student than a creative mind.
So it was even more surprising that I was asked to design advertisements for the German language Epoch Times. Because there were no templates, we started from scratch. This began right after the company was founded in 2005. Although I was inexperienced, my ideas were well received, and I acquired a basic knowledge and style on my own. I got help from acquaintances and experienced practitioners; they gave me simple but very helpful tips that I still use today. I also turned to my old friends, books, and taught myself the basics.
I realized at the time that I was always supported—probably by the deities who saw my desire to keep improving. I realized that I was given the skills I needed for each project or task. I was also active in other projects and went to group Fa study regularly. On the side, I also finished my studies.
But the work became increasingly difficult after a few years. I missed deadlines and there were gaps in my work. I often did not study the Fa enough—especially not with the local group. I also neglected my family, and I wept out of frustration.
Then came the news that we had to stop printing the newspaper. Only then did I realize that I had neglected the most fundamental thing—my cultivation. When we stopped printing the newspaper, it was like a stick warning. I woke up and I was infinitely grateful to revered Master for giving me the opportunity to start over.
Master taught us:
“And the impression that you give others will not be that of a cultivator. No matter how busy you may get, you still must study the Fa. This is why I am recommending that the Dafa disciples who are immersed in our various projects find time to participate in the local Fa-study. The reason is, in the preceding time, many a project asked me whether it would be alright for them to find time to study the Fa on their own, and so I have been observing, looking to see whether they could have a good handle on their own cultivation and meet the standard while not participating in the large group Fa-studies. The outcome, I found, was that they couldn’t. And not only didn’t they meet that standard, I found that they were stagnating; they were handling many things terribly.” (“Dafa Disciples Must Study the Fa,” Collected Teachings Given Around the World Volume XI)
That was undoubtedly the case with me at the time. I swore before Master, the gods, my sentient beings, and myself, “When I resume working for The Epoch Times, I won’t neglect group Fa study.”
Of course, there are deadlines to meet and things that cannot be postponed, but one’s state of mind is crucial. I realized how important it was to study the Fa with the local group. This is the path that Master left for us.
I really did return to the newspaper four years later, and I’ve had 12 different areas of responsibility and positions.
Every practitioner who participates in a project knows how challenging it can be to cooperate with other practitioners. Everything is tied to our cultivation, but we often realize this too late or only when looking back. So I imperceptibly built up resentment toward some colleagues and didn’t recognize it for a long time.
In Lecture Six of Zhuan Falun, Master talks about disturbances when practitioners do the exercises.
Master said:
“Many of you have never thought about it further. What’s really going on? You only find it odd and feel quite disappointed about being unable to practice qigong. This “oddness” will stop your practice.” (Lecture Six, Zhuan Falun)
For a while, the expression, “this “oddness” will stop your practice,” puzzled me. What is this sentence trying to tell me? I realized that it is precisely this discontent and the fact that I find something “odd” that prevents me from treating others with kindness and understanding. I often think in human terms: “A thing should be done this way or that way; that’s logical.” Or, “That’s not normal,” or, “That’s not how it works.” If something in the project was not done according to supposed “common sense,” reason, or the general norm that is customary in a company, I dismissed it and immediately closed myself off to any ideas or instructions.
So I had basically “blocked” myself and I constantly complained to myself. The criticism I expressed publicly was often misunderstood or simply dismissed as negativity—I was told not to hinder the process and to look at things with an open mind. This drove me even further away from the others, and I slowly noticed that an invisible partition was forming.
In the end, though, it was just that things weren’t going the way I wanted them to. For a long time, I couldn’t understand that. Whenever I spoke with colleagues, I listened to them at length, and I also picked up on their frustration and dissatisfaction. Although I tried to encourage them by assuring them that things would certainly get better in the future, my resentment continued to grow. I didn’t realize that my colleagues were coming to me so that I could recognize my own shortcomings and let go of my views. Instead, I reinforced their feelings and my own.
At the same time, my abilities stopped developing. What had been so easy at the beginning with the help of the deities disappeared. There was no inspiration or creative impetus. Where resentment and frustration arose, I simply did not improve in what I did. I’m now responsible for the print edition and I need to improve in many areas so that we can attract more readers. But no matter how hard I tried to improve, it didn’t help. I almost came to a standstill—in cultivation and also in my work.
Since I did not act according to Dafa’s principles and did not treat my colleagues with forbearance and kindness, I remained at the same level for a long time, and I did not advance. I didn’t realize that I had to think of others and actively break out of my own views. I finally realized that I should let go of my own ideas and put more trust in my colleagues, even if not everything is logical or well thought out. That is not the essential thing.
That was a breakthrough and an entirely new way of thinking for me.
I also noticed I had a strong arrogance: How can I presume to think that I am in any way responsible for the direction of the project? How can I presume to say whether something is going well in the company or not? Isn’t that like gossip among ordinary people? Have I cultivated my speech?
Master said in Zhuan Falun:
“We should all speak according to a practitioner’s xinxing rather than create conflicts or say something improper. As cultivators, we must measure ourselves with the standard of the Fa to determine whether we should say certain things.” (Lecture Eight, Zhuan Falun)
Hadn’t I sown “conflicts” with my thoughts and words? This realization shocked me, but my behavior continued, and I always realized far too late that I should have said nothing.
Behind this arrogance, I also discovered the view that I take everything too much to heart—not only the criticism directed at me, but also the problems of the project and the practitioners.
I often worried about the direction everything was taking, and this weighed heavily on my mind. I wasn’t thinking about the others or the company, however, but about myself: “The company is not running according to my ideas.” I also failed to understand that many things are shown to me so that I can recognize them and let them go.
My realization from this is that I must do my part and do it wholeheartedly—but nothing more. Supporting others, accompanying them, and actively participating—that is the true kindness that I should show as a cultivator.
I am not in this project because of my superiors, or for my colleagues—we are on this path together to help Master rectify the Fa and save sentient beings.
Master said:
“Don’t think of our media as some special kind of media that’s different from ordinary media. A company is a company. In Dafa there are no companies, and in Dafa there are no media. Those aren’t cultivation, and they are not part of Dafa. However, in that setting you can do cultivation, and you are cultivators. That’s how I look at it. Whatever company you are in, you should try to do better and not be averse to being managed.” (“Fa Teaching on World Falun Dafa Day,” Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. XII)
When I heard myself say, “It’s a company run by practitioners, so I expect more,” I remembered this passage from the Fa teaching and then corrected myself.
It is now easier for me to look at the conflicts among us—it is the environment that is important in cultivation, and this can only come about if I look at it that way, take it seriously, and treat my colleagues with kindness. Everything else belongs to an ordinary company, and I must not worry too much about it.
I thank revered Master and my fellow cultivators.
(Presented at the 2025 Germany Fa Conference)