(Minghui.org) Greetings to compassionate Master! Greetings to fellow practitioners!
I obtained Dafa on May 4, 2023. It was compassionate Master who awakened me from deep delusion and led me on the road of returning to my original, true self. Fellow practitioners told me that at these final moments, of the 7 billion people, I was very lucky to be able to start practicing. Hearing this, I felt a profound sense of responsibility. I am deeply grateful for Master’s compassion, and understand how challenging it has been for Dafa practitioners to validate the Fa and navigate the ups and downs of their cultivation journeys. I have transformed from being an ordinary person who drifts with the crowd in delusion, to a cultivator on the path to the divine. After studying the Fa, I am deeply aware of this world-changing personal destiny, and the profound meaning behind it. I worry about whether I can be worthy of the title Dafa practitioner. I think that I can only cultivate well and do the three things diligently.
Writing Is Cultivation
Writing my experience-sharing article for the Fa conference this year was particularly challenging. My cultivation has been stagnant for some time, and I doubted my ability to do well. I thought I was rational and diligent, but upon truly looking inward, I discovered many shortcomings and attachments. At times, I have even sought excuses for my attachments under the guise of understanding the Fa, leaving me frustrated and disheartened, and filled with a sense of failure. I struggled with whether to write the article, but finally mustered the courage to face my attachments and reflect deeply, working tirelessly to draft it. Yet its lack of practical cultivation insights and overemphasis on rational analysis fell short of the standard, leaving me feeling dejected.
Through this process, I clearly saw my attachments, which included worrying about others’ opinions, competitiveness, fear, and jealousy. Only then did I realize that writing was itself part of cultivation. It requires openly confronting attachments and sharing with a selfless heart.
Looking Inward is True Cultivation
I once lamented how obtuse I was for obtaining the Fa so late, but through Fa study, I realized that everything was arranged this way. Through a shared connection with tea, I met a friend who gave me the precious book Zhuan Falun. Tea also connected me with more fellow practitioners, enabling us to work together to validate the Fa. Everything was predestined. From the reason for obtaining the Fa to the arrangement of our cultivation environment, the opportunities to participate in projects, the difficulties of improving xinxing during the cultivation process, and the settling of grudges bit by bit and reducing karma—were all meticulously arranged by Master for my cultivation journey.
In January of this year, nine of us Dafa practitioners started working together to validate Dafa. We are of different ages, we have cultivated for different amounts of time, and we have different cultivation states, as well as different ways of thinking. There are no coincidences in cultivation. Master arranged for us, a group of people with deep predestined relationships, to come together to do things, and at the same time settle various grievances. Due to the complex historical predestined relationships and each person’s different attachments, conflicts have arisen within our team at times. Whether we cultivate with our celestial eyes open or not, we are all in a state of delusion. The standards for cultivation remain strict. As Master taught us:
“When there is a problem, look inward to find the cause—this is the fundamental difference between a Dafa disciple and a non-practitioner.” (“To the Shandong Falun Dafa Assistance Center,” Essentials for Further Advancement)
Through studying the Fa, I realized that the root cause of the impure environment was our failure to look inward unconditionally.
When conflicts pointed directly to my heart, my unkindness and selfishness were exposed. I complained and criticized those who were not kind to me, seeking to balance my heart. I could not tolerate others’ attachments, but when I unconditionally looked inward, I suddenly realized that all the people I couldn’t tolerate were actually mirrors reflecting my own attachments—without exception. The shock I felt was profound. I hadn’t noticed this before because I was protecting my sense of gain and superiority, unwilling to admit or confront it. It was as if I could see through some people and things, observing them coldly, harboring prejudices. When I deeply understood that the complex relationships were just continuations and resolutions of historical predestined connections, true compassion and goodwill arose. My prejudices were merely based on my personal beliefs and calculations of gains and losses. A practitioner should not judge right and wrong using human principles, but should instead apply a higher standard for ourselves. I realized that only by maintaining kindness and being grateful and compassionate toward everyone and everything I encounter—without resentment or hatred, taking suffering as joy—can I repay my karmic debts.
I value efficiency and results in my work, believing that others should do the same. I overlooked the fact that everyone has different abilities and states, failing to embody the slow and steady approach of a cultivator, unintentionally creating a sense of pressure. I often get tangled in right and wrong, always arguing based on differing understandings or feelings of unfairness. But what does it matter if I am right? I did not practice kindness or forbearance, which not only affected the mutual trust, but also failed to help with my own xinxing improvement. It actually exposed my most stubborn attachment, the protection of “self.” I have come to realize more clearly that the “self” is a prison, trapping me in my own demonic nature and suffering, making it impossible to escape. I learned that in any situation, I must first consider others to break free from the demon of “selfishness.”
I couldn’t tolerate the management issues and found myself blaming and complaining. I proposed reform plans, and wanted to work hard to change the situation. While studying the Fa, Master enlightened me not to force things, and maintain virtue. So I thought that leaving was the best choice. However, my dissatisfaction remained stubborn, like weeds.
I realized that regardless of the reason or the seriousness of the problem, one should not look outward to blame others, as this is unkind. Even if someone else is at fault, one should look inward and be understanding. To approach something with dissatisfaction is to avoid confronting the conflicts and tests. It may seem like liberation, but in reality it fosters the attachment to self and a fear of complex situations. If this attachment is not eliminated, it will inevitably resurface in a new environment, making it harder to pass the tests. A complicated environment is simply a condition for improving xinxing. Whether big or small, validating the Fa was quite possibly arranged as it was in history, and not accomplishing these things is also not simple. It means wasting precious time in the final stages of saving sentient beings.
We Can Cultivate in Any Environment
After leaving the group cultivation environment, I was unsure how to better validate the Fa. Fortunately, the Dafa Association played the 2007 Teachings at the Conference in Australia, where Master pointed out the direction for me. I realized that I can cultivate myself in my daily life, everywhere and at all times. In a project, no matter how big or small the work is, there is no distinction between high and low. Actively participating is a way to clarify the truth to sentient beings. I realized that I could distribute The Epoch Times. Despite the hot weather and the tough work, distributing newspapers may seem insignificant, but each paper carries a significant mission. During the process, I truly felt like a messenger of the divine, delivering hope and blessings of salvation to sentient beings. After each distribution, my mood was especially joyful. Also through this process, I discovered many of my attachments: the fear of rejection, my desire to maintain a good image, my pride in not wanting to be humble, and my comfort-seeking thoughts.
I am determined to do the three things well, regardless of the difficulties I encounter. With this wish, Master has helped me. I found that my new home is very close to the practice site, truth clarification site, and the activity center. At the same time, I have the opportunity to participate in the promotion of Gan Jing World.
I was previously afraid of rejection because I cared about my reputation, but the mission of being a Dafa practitioner filled me with a sacred state of mind toward the promotional work. Unconsciously, I worked for more than ten hours a day, standing, but I didn’t feel tired. I found that as long as I worked on Dafa projects, I was full of energy and never felt exhausted—this power comes from Dafa. During the promotion, I also cultivated. My fellow practitioner and I spent hours non-stop handing out flyers, but only three or four people downloaded the app. We felt anxious, thinking we weren’t able to do as well as others. When looking inward, the fellow practitioner realized that it was the fear of losing that had caused the issue. Our self-blame and fear of not doing well stemmed from a “selfish” mindset, rather than a pure, compassionate attitude of saving people and believing in Master and the Fa.
I also understood Master’s enlightenment: I lost my Gan Jing World T-shirt and couldn’t find it anywhere. I couldn’t figure out why this happened until I realized that “losing” was a reminder of my fear of becoming a “loser.” I have had strong self-esteem since childhood and didn’t want to be worse than others. I worked hard, striving to be a valuable person, someone useful to others. These worldly values were actually a strong attachment to self. At the same time, another practitioner reminded me not to lose the most important thing—studying the Fa. I must arrange time every day to focus on Fa study and practice all five exercises, as only then can I have the power of the Fa to do things. I realized that losing the T-shirt was also a hint from Master that the most important thing is to study the Fa, and not work just for the sake of working.
Master said:
“So everything that you do, be it your balancing well your family relationships while you live among ordinary people, balancing well your relationships in society, how you perform at your workplace, how you conduct yourself in society, etc., none of these are things you can just go through the motions on. All of these are part of your cultivation format, and are serious matters.” (“Fa Teaching Given at the 2006 Conference in Canada,” Collected Teachings Given Around the World, Volume VII)
In the past, I had focused on work and validating the Fa outside, neglecting my family and friends. After leaving the work environment where most Dafa practitioners were, I began to consciously contact more ordinary people, meet up with friends, spend time with my family, and make up for the omissions in my daily life in cultivation and truth-clarification. During this time, I discovered many attachments that I hadn’t paid attention to. When talking to people to clarify the facts, I was afraid to openly say that I practiced Falun Gong. I was held back by fear, which led to impure thoughts and ineffective truth-clarification. When I casually complained to my husband that he treated the cat better than me, I realized that my jealousy was so strong that even a cat bothered me. Upon hearing my brother complain that I didn’t care for our parents, I became defensive and argued that it was our parents’ fault for their constant quarrels. That’s when I realized that I harbored resentment toward my parents and jealousy toward my brother. In my energy field, there was resentment and jealousy, which deviated from the nature of the universe and created separation. This naturally affected my relationship with my family.
When I felt hurt or upset, I often blamed my family, complaining that they didn’t love me enough. But when I looked inward unconditionally, I saw my selfishness, my greed for love and what I wanted from others, and my desire to control the arrangements of my life. Through practice, I realized that when I let go of self, abandoned the notion of “me,” and focused on understanding the suffering of others and giving without asking, I liberated myself from feelings of hurt, anger, and sorrow. It makes me think of this phrase from Master’s teachings:
“…righteous Enlightenment of selflessness and altruism.” (“Non-Omission in Buddha-Nature,” Essentials for Further Advancement)
Anger Stems From Jealousy
I was listening to a recording of a lecture when Master’s word “qi’ penetrated into my mind. I suddenly woke up and realized that I was feeling angry at that moment. Digging deeper, I found that I was often driven by “angry” emotions. I was angry when I felt something was unfair, angry when I couldn’t stand something, angry when I was misunderstood, angry when I was under pressure, angry when I was ignored, and angry when I was criticized. Why did I have so much anger?
Whenever I feel an emotion, I compare it with this experience. I realize that all the anger inside me, the sense of unfairness, and the feeling of injustice come from my emotional attachment to “self” and the imbalance caused by jealousy. Selfishness and jealousy are manifestations of my demon nature, the polluted thoughts formed by the old universe, and external influences. Unknowingly, they lead me away from goodness. When I realized that I often unconsciously exist in the state of a wicked person, the demonic part of me was suppressed, and my thoughts began to shift toward the state of a compassionate person.
Master is Right Beside Me
When I eliminated all my worries and made up my mind to go out to spread the Fa for the first time, I unfortunately took the wrong route. In a rush to switch trains and worried about being late, I ran toward the closing doors of a train. Someone smiled warmly at me, and I realized it was a fellow practitioner I had met the day before while distributing The Epoch Times. She kindly guided me through the complicated transfers, and we arrived at the site on time. I realized that Master was by my side. To encourage my cultivation, during meditation, Master also allowed me to vaguely see my home in heaven, which is my true home.
Once when I was doing the exercises, my mind was driven by attachments, and I was entangled in conflicts with others and felt angry. I suddenly heard Master saying very sternly in the exercise music, “Slowly put [it] down!” I was shocked. I was unconsciously practicing an evil way. I had bad thoughts. It turned out that Master was watching me. I feel deeply ashamed of myself for being filled with evil thoughts and not behaving like a cultivator.
While distributing Gan Jing World flyers, it started to rain heavily. As we were about to rush to another building we noticed a green umbrella by the wall. Hesitant about borrowing it since its owner wasn’t around, we opened it and found it was a damaged, abandoned umbrella. This umbrella helped us avoid getting ourselves and the flyers wet as we moved through the buildings. I felt Master’s meticulous care for us.
While traveling abroad to attend the Fa conference, I encountered a broken seat on the long-distance bus. I unintentionally felt some complaints in my heart. At that moment, my backpack fell from the back of the bus into a muddy puddle. I immediately realized it was Master reminding me to rid myself of wrong thoughts. Also on the road, worried about my child’s safety at home, I clearly heard in the Fa lecture, “Master is taking care...”
After a year and a half of cultivation, looking back, I realize that every step of my xinxing improvement, through ups and downs, has been under Master’s care. No matter when I encountered problems, or even when I wasn’t aware of my attachments, Master has guided me during Fa study and in daily life. Compassionate Master has led me through the confusion in my heart. I often wonder what I did right in my previous lives to be so lucky to become what Master called “the happiest life in the universe.” With such an opportunity, all the suffering is worth it. I know that all the arrangements in cultivation, no matter how difficult, are the best for us. Only by cherishing this once-in-eternity opportunity and cultivating diligently can we live up to Master’s compassionate salvation.
The above is my personal understanding. If there are any parts that are not in line with the Fa, please kindly point them out to me.
Thank you, Master! Thank you, fellow practitioners!
(Presented at the 2024 Singapore Fa Conference)
Copyright © 1999-2025 Minghui.org. All rights reserved.
